Kunming – three pairs of pants

25 December 201526 January 2018

Day 102 (Fri 25 Dec): Kunming to Anshun

Merry Christmas, everybody 🙂 Christmas is not so all-consuming here, a funny mix between shopping, a gentle festive vibe and business-as-usual. Which was lucky as it turned out to be a travel day. So we “rode forward” on the metro:

… to the (very busy) train station.

A totally chilled day watching the world go by (well, China anyway), through the changing landscape:

… fuelled by copious quantities of coffee (by my standards at least, which means I got through almost one teaspoon):

Learning my lesson from train travel in Vietnam, we booked the soft sleeper, and had the cabin to ourselves. Result 🙂

Staff were very willing and helpful throughout our journey, but they didn’t seem to fully appreciate that we didn’t speak Chinese. So we rolled with it: after clearly signaling that we had no idea what she was saying, and getting a response of a friendly smile, nod and further instructions in Chinese, Rudy preceded to have a conversation with her, with neither understanding the other (“Ah,” said Rudy, holding the disposable slippers, “one on each foot, yes.”). I was crying with laughter. Maybe you had to be there.

The journey whizzed by all too quickly. We really didn’t want to arrive.

But I’m glad we did because Rudy had booked the Hilton. Awesome Christmas present. Thanks, Rudy 😀

But first we had to get there. Taxi driver didn’t understand “Hilton” (isn’t that a universal term, especially if you’re a taxi driver with a Hilton in your city?), and couldn’t read a map (!). Within moments, a young lady had stepped in to assist with her basic English, and even tried calling the number on my booking. Five minutes, and about a dozen locals later, we were on our way through Anshun.

Welcome cookie. Never had a welcome cookie before. I knew I was going to like this place 🙂

amazing views:

Full-size swimming pool with jacuzzi:

Gym and yoga studio also helped. Add into the mix a bath, rainfall shower, tonnes of toiletries, a mini bar, kettle and the comfiest bed ever, and I was one very happy bunny. Even the most independent, go-with-the-flow girl need a bit of luxury sometimes 😉

After a long, hard swim and long, gentle jacuzzi (where I had a long conversation with Bruce, courtesy of the app on his phone), I disappeared into the ladies’ changing rooms… followed by one of the attendants. She proceeded to take care of me: providing more towels than I knew what you do with, turning on the shower and adjusting it to a nice temperature, escorting me to the sauna when I was done (which I unfortunately had to decline due to time constraints) and keeping an eye on me whilst I got dressed (which was rather disconcerting, but done with the best of intentions). Cotton buds, hair dryer and three different types of hairbrush were provided, too. I emerged exercised, relaxed and beautifully clean and remembered how much I love swimming. Only a piano was required to compete the set and I figured a place the size of Anshun may have one somewhere. But I was very happy with the home comforts so far and food was higher up the agenda.

As we walked over the bridge into town, we saw the dancing fountains… and were spotted by the locals. More photo requests as Rudy tried to video, and we duly obliged. “You’re starting to like all the attention, aren’t you?” I asked Rudy. “Yeah, it’s great,” he replied, “I’ve never been this popular in Belgium!”

We spotted it at the same time. I couldn’t believe it, and Rudy knew what was coming. “May I play?” I asked the assistant; she nodded and signalled to the piano.

It was quite late by the time I’d had my fix and, the Asians being early eaters, our dinner options were limited. But we struck lucky. After perusing the menu of a street cafe…

… we pointed at dishes others were eating, and signalled how many of each!

Christmas dinner (the peas were amazing, and the first I’ve had all trip):

Then back to the hotel, fed, tired and happy, for a sleep in a big, comfy, warm bed. Today was one of the most memorable Christmas days ever 🙂

24 December 201526 January 2018

Day 101 (Thu 24 Dec): Kunming (round town)

Vodafone World Traveller. It caused much stress and wasted time at the beginning of my trip, but has now come into its own – I spent hours on the phone for just £5. And it meant I could access mobile data which was so much faster than Wi-Fi. It also meant I could finally upload some photos without the WordPress app crashing. Then out into the city:

… to the train station. With my passport. Airport-like security seemed to be kidding the public as none of the staff seemed to be paying much attention to what was going through:

But we got our tickets:

And the metro back – I noticed that they use plastic cards which they recycle (London Underground please take more):

Another odd jacket slogan: “School kills”. Odd – I’ve always found education to be life-enhancing rather than life-terminating.

East and West pagodas were the nominal target for the afternoon but, like the metro, were still under construction. So we had mango sorbet and a strawberry shake instead and then wandered back slowly (stopping occasionally for people to take photos of us – we’re still the main attraction in town, which for the camera shy doesn’t sit easily, but I’m slowly getting used to it), past fur sellers (I assume it’s real, but I can’t tell the difference):

… lots of police and the army:

Something was obviously going on, but I couldn’t tell what.

This translation perplexed me somewhat:

And to the supermarket. When we emerged, the place was heaving. Heavy traffic (with “right on red”causing utter chaos, not helped by the fact that scooters seem to be immune to the few traffic rules they have):

Why the crowds? Maybe it was because it was Christmas Eve, but there’s only a nominal nod to Christmas here – a few banners in hotels/shops, some Christmas music and the odd street vendor selling white fur-lined red hats. I guess I’ll never really know.

23 December 201526 January 2018

Day 100 (Wed 23 Dec): Kunming (Stone Forest)

But why can’t I take the subway to the bus station? The map clearly showed a metro line from the station near our hotel to the terminal. Ah, I see. Because it’s not built yet. Right. I suppose that’s a pretty good reason. The number 50 bus it’ll have to be then. Only the number 50 bus never turned up. All the others, but no number 50. In that case, we’ll just take a taxi. What do you mean it’s too far? You’re a taxi driver for Buddha’s sake – it’s your job. Ah, what you mean is “it’s too much hassle”. Right, OK.

Luckily, the lad on reception at our hotel was switched on. So with our phone apps translating, we finally made it to the bus station. An hour and a half behind schedule. But then the challenge of finding the actual ticket office… Eventually we were on the express bus to the Stone Forest. And it took forty minutes less than planned to get there. Or so we thought. Dumped in the car park, we had no idea where to go. Come on, China, help us out here.

Ok, so now we take a golf buggy to the ticket hall. It appeared we were dropped at one end and picked up at the other. But the ticket office wasn’t in between. For some reason only the planner understood, the ticket office was the other end of a plaza on the other side of the road. Twenty minutes later, tickets in hand, we made our way back to the buggy station to catch one into the park. What do you mean we need a separate buggy ticket? Why didn’t they offer that at the ticket office? Better still, as 99.9% of people take the buggy (it’s a fair distance into the park), why don’t you just add the costs together and sell me one ticket?

So we went back to the ticket hall across the road, to a separate ticket counter that looked exactly like the previous one and bought a separate golf buggy ticket.

I’d arrived at the park with expectations. It was only when they were thwarted that I became conscious of them. Natural wonder over a few square kilometres, so that means entrance ticket and then wandering around trails and going off-piste into the semi-wilderness. Wrong.

The natural wonder has paved walkways, signposts and, wait for it… a “ring road”. No, I’m not kidding. Yes, my heart sank as well. I had to revise my expectations and try to enjoy it for the tourist circus that it was.

But it wasn’t that bad. We got the golf buggy a couple of stops round the park and wandered away from the main road:

The Stone Forest of Yunnan was made a UNESCO geopark in 2004 due to its “representative karst features” and “outstanding scientific and aesthetic values”. Formed 270 million years ago over four major geological time periods it is “one of the world’s most spectacular examples of humid tropical to subtropical karst landscapes”. Unsurprisingly, the dolomitic limestone karsts in a “diversity of shapes and colours that change with different weather and light conditions” reminded me of Ha Long Bay:

Karst pits are formed by water dripping on the rock, whilst the “discontinuous fissures” (the cracks that you can see running between the strata) are a result of an “easily soluble component on the limestone with uneven composition”. I’ll leave Dad to explain this one, but I think wheat they meant was that there was a soluble layer in the formation of the strata that has decomposed quicker than those around it, leaving the cracks.

I also learnt that the earth has existed for 4.6 billion years, and liked the table showing the various geological periods (I think I’m a scientist at heart):

I’m definitely a User Experience specialist, though and go through life noting all the potential improvements. For instance, the many maps throughout the site didn’t use the same orientation: sometimes north was up, sometimes to the left, sometimes to the right. It was like one of those spatial awareness tests.

Once we’d explored we did a complete circuit on the golf buggies. It took ten minutes. This explained why people were already leaving when we arrived – they must have arrived, got on a golf buggy, got off at the central tourist circus and then gone home. Each to their own.

Food was available at the central tourist place, which was welcome – although this looks spongy it’s actually got a consistency not dissimilar to tofu:

Just caught the next bus back to Kunming and off to the train station in the less savoury part of town (“Sam, keep going – you’ve stopped on prostitute corner”):

… to book a ticket out of the city. It was heaving – long queues at each of the ticket counters (not many people using the automated machines, the opposite of most stations in England), with each transaction taking ages (which explains the long queues). And in front of each counter was a turnstile – another reminder of the Chinese culture. I had a flashback to the queue for the sunset temple near Angkor Wat – they had specific staff stopping people queue-jumping and all those I saw who tried to push in were Chinese. You just wouldn’t need the barriers in England. Unfortunately, I’d forgotten that you need a passport to book tickets here. Mission aborted. Staying here another day was an easy decision.

22 December 201526 January 2018

Day 99 (Tue 22 Dec): Kunming (Yuantong temple, Green Lake Park)

Why aren’t there many tourists in China? Two reasons, I reckon: firstly, because hardly anyone speaks English, the international language, so it’s difficult to communicate; and secondly because the Chinese powers-that-be have made it so darn difficult to obtain/extend a visa. To get a visa, I had to produce: proof of transit into and out of the country, proof of funds, completed application form and a hotel reservation (and passport, obviously). Compare this to Thailand, Cambodia, Laos and Vietnam who issue visas on arrival (I knew that I’d stay more than 15 days in Vietnam so applied online for a ninety-day visa and just collected it from their embassy in London a few days later). With these countries so close to China, it’s not surprising that most people don’t bother jumping through the hoops. Rudy wanted to extend his stay for another 30 days so duly jumped through said hoops… And was then told to come back to the embassy in seven working days. If someone only has a thirty-day visa, do they really think they’ll hang around one place for nine days? Come on, China, think about it. Mind you, perhaps I should keep quiet because the lack of westerners is often a blessing.

After his wasted morning, Rudy and I hit town:

Stopping a sweet potato vendor for breakfast, we pointed at two large spuds that in Jianshui would have cost about 10 yuan. He signalled 25 yuan. We laughed and walked away… then back to the jacket potato vendor opposite him and duly bought two for 10 yuan. We shrugged at his gesticulations. That’ll teach him to try to screw the tourists 😉

Walking through the city:

… I tried to articulate what made it so fantastically different to London: wide roads, buildings not so high or old, much less variety in building style with most being of the modern, metal persuasion. And it was sunny 😉

Yuantong temple is the largest in the city:

… and proudly displayed this accolade:

Monks were out in force, with many worshippers both inside and out:

It appeared to be a Buddhist shrine, but a very different style, posture and decoration than that I’ve seen before:

And they don’t take their shoes off when they enter a temple. Whilst taking off my laced shoes got a bit of a hassle, I quite liked the gesture and it seemed odd not to do it here.

The locals seemed to be enjoying the sunshine, too:

Bakeries were few and far between in SE Asia, mainly being found where the ex-pats congregated. China has them in abundance, which is both good (I’m rather partial to a currant bun or two) and bad (I’m rather partial to a currant bun or two). English translation were welcome, although this one worried me slightly:

Green Lake Park is a social hub of the city, with communal dance sessions:

Live music:

But all a bit too circus-like to be relaxing. For instance, near the entrance we saw people holding bread in one hand and smiling inanely at a bunch of cameras pointing at them. Various people were making squawking noises. Turns out that one of the “things to do” in the park is get a photo with one of the seagulls taking food out of your hand. No idea, sorry, don’t ask me, I’m just telling you what I saw, not explaining it.

Candy floss as art:

But we’re still the main attraction. It took me a little while to work out that he didn’t want me to take a picture of him, wife and child, but that he wanted his wife to take a picture of him and child with Rudy and me. Sorry, I’m just not cut out for the limelight.

21 December 201526 January 2018

Day 98 (Mon 21 Dec): Pugaolao to Kunming

Up early to catch the sunrise:

… and the mini van to Xinjie, with the front passenger smoking a cigarette. China, this is not progressive. Please re-think. Thank you.

Asians might be able to handle their chili, but they have weak stomachs: travel sickness is more common than not and most buses have strategically-placed bins and bags. It doesn’t help that they eat lots at the beginning of the journey, so it’s not surprising that they spend most of the remaining time being sick.

Just outside the town, the driver stopped and dragged four bags of rubble to the rough bit of road in front where he emptied them:

I think it was so that the front spoiler didn’t get damaged. Never seen that before.

Another unexpected difference was that we didn’t stop for lunch proper, just two toilet stops with a snack shop. But Rudy found a little stall selling spicy potatoes that went down very well indeed:

But the lack of lunch was more than made up for by the scenery:

Unlike Laos, here they have money so the roads cut into the mountainside used wire and concrete to hold back the earth. Like the Twyford bypass. Except completely different, of course.

And finally to Kunming and the signs of prosperity: traffic jams and high rise buildings.

The metro into the centre was clean, fast, efficient and cheap.

I had a flashback to the Dubai metro and it suddenly dawned on me how far I’ve travelled and how long I’ve been away.